| the one with life. |
[22 Aug 2004|06:28pm] |
this could possibly be the worst week ever in my life.
she hasn't even left yet. it's only a matter of days.
he left ages ago.
and now it's my turn.
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| the one with the van. |
[21 Aug 2004|07:21pm] |
so i really love the rain. it has been thundering, and i love it. it makes me happy. which is extremely good.
i’m going to leigh’s in a bit. we’ll probably end up discussing those secrets shannon told me. which is good, but i’m already so upset i don’t need more of it. i’m over that part of my life right now, but it still subconsciously bothers me.
the van broke down today. this means we might be getting a new car. and then again maybe not. but i’m still excited. i really hope it gets totaled. it's such an old thing. i hate it.
anyways. do we have english homework? fifth period?
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| the one with the unfinished article. |
[21 Aug 2004|07:01pm] |
Mysterious teenage death chain, alphabetical
Suze Brinkley
Police reported 25 unusual teenage murders within the past three months in Charlotte and the surrounding areas.
The police discovered three peculiarities so far about this unsolved mystery.
“Firstly, the names of the victims are in alphabetical, chronological order, beginning at the letter ‘b.’ Secondly, the murderer appears unbiased to gender, as they alternate male, female, male, female, et cetera. Thirdly, there seems to be some sort of rhyming scheme that may be the key to the said Mecklenburg County detective Bill Owens, Thursday, the day after the 25th death.
Owens has been working on the case since the report of the fourth death on May 17.
Last May, Amanda Hardie, 15, reported an attempted murder that may be the missing link to this alphabet death chain. Her injury complies with all three patterns and possibly makes up the first and last link in the teen murder chain.
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| the one with nat. |
[21 Aug 2004|12:26pm] |
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i am done talking to nat and i am not at all satisfied.
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| the one with the farmer's market. |
[21 Aug 2004|12:09pm] |
so i got up early, after a dream that my sister was getting married because she wanted a wedding cake and i had to make it, but she wasn't engaged to anyone, so she propsed to a stranger on the street to get married to the next day and she was going to wear her black gallery opening dress. then my cake, lemon with blue icing actually turned out gorgeous and she told me it was ugly. then she called of the wedding, which was never supposed to happen anyway.
oh. just so you know, everyone seems to be getting married these days. or at least engaged. except for my sister. who you know. isn't. melody, lindsay, marjie, katie, moira, jenni, erin. that's what, seven so far? who's next?
anyways. so then we went to the farmer's market and we had breakfast and looked at flowers, honey, soap, and herbs. then we left and went to starbucks, after which i saw kate and her parents in the parking lot. and i had half an urge to clamber over to her and give her the biggest hug in the world and cry. but i didn't. instead, i waved. the i came home and actually decorated a cake for my dad's birthday. i hate that my parents are so old. my mom's going to be fifty on my next birthday, my sixteenth. we'll have to have a big joint party. anyways. and my dad's going to be fifty-three tomorrow. maybe fifty-four. i forget. anyways.
i have so much homework to do. but i can postpone it while i talk to nat. thank god i'm talking to nat.
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| the one with shoes. |
[20 Aug 2004|10:26pm] |
i went to the mall and bought three pairs of shoes. is it enough to cheer me up?
we shall see.
john is lots cooler than i ever imagined. really.
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| the one with people. |
[20 Aug 2004|07:47pm] |
who is making my week better (or worse), when i get the chance to see them? let's list.
kristin: i don't see her as much i seemed to last year, even though it's more. i miss her, but i don't need to because she's always right there. forcefeeding is fun.
dani: she's always there and she has this amazing ability to tell when something's wrong with me. which is a lot lately.
the phat kid with short hair: she still appreciates my poserpunkemoloserisms and we always manage to laugh about something. which is grand.
kate: i don't know if she still thinks i'm mad at her. i hope she knows my week isn't going well at all, and i don't intend to take it out on her. really.
ellie: she has the prettiest smile, and can make me smile and i look forward very much to seeing her these days. i miss her, as well.
summer: i miss this baby like hell too! we have zero classes together. i need realism. i need the truth. now.
*caitlin: i was, i really was going to mention her last night, but i got carried away and didn't. she is one of the sweetest, silliest and can always make me laugh, which is important.
that is all. you know who i wish i could see/talk to?
nat: i haven't spoken to him since sunday. he never stays online very long. i miss him. he always helps me get things right.
daniel: i won't say anything about daniel. it should be obvious, anyway.
man i welcome the weekends. i have to dread school now, in contrast to last year when i embraced school and hated weekends. ugh. i dislike change. a lot.
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| the one with a terrible week. |
[20 Aug 2004|07:32pm] |
my bad feelings about this week have come true. i hate it. the whole year is going to be this bad, or worse. things never start out badly and get better; only progressively worse. i've noticed this in my fifteen and a half years of life.
people keep offending me and i keep it to myself. i hate keeping things to myself. i need someone to talk to, but i feel so distant lately. so angry. no one understands me anymore. i laugh ten times less than i used to. i want to cry. i'm in the same kind of mood i was this time last friday. i need to cry, but i don't want to relive it all again. i know i just want everything to end.
i am so angry right now. i hate those people. they make me feel so out of place, and they're all still mad at me for kissing daniel. i really don't care. honestly. i just hate having to be forced to be with people who a) believe in completely different things, b) are entirely uninteresting, c) suck, d)hate me, or e) some or all of the above.
i hate that i love my memories so much that i concentrate solely on them and all i need to do is forget them, but in doing that i would only be unhappier.
aim isn't working and it's pissing me off.
oh wait, i'm already pissed off. right.
i'm starting to click with kennedy, which is really awesome. i need a new old friend.
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| the one with b-days. |
[18 Aug 2004|09:30pm] |
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today was long and tiring. i babysat, while they saw the grateful dead, i mean, the dead, in concert. and then i took chemistry notes, and more chemistry notes, and then MORE chemistry notes. ms sturgies and i are not going to get along well. i am not looking forward to tomorrow. i already hate b-days, and i've only had one so far.
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| the one with the bad dream. |
[18 Aug 2004|03:33pm] |
ahhh. i miss daniel. so much. augh. i want him, and i want him now. i can just imagine how i would respond if i saw him right now. but i won't post it here.
but.
i had a bad dream last night. a nightmare, in fact. i woke up cold and sad. ellie, the doll she is, though, helped me translate it into my kind of english. and kristin was in it and she was speaking french. i don't remember what she said, but i know she had to play some form of charades to get me to understand her. everyone is so confusing. god.
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| the one with nick's self-evaluation. |
[17 Aug 2004|03:51pm] |
Antichrist NOW66: wow
Antichrist NOW66: im tall
Antichrist NOW66: and skinny
Antichrist NOW66: and handsome
Antichrist NOW66: and pretty
Antichrist NOW66: and gentlemanly
Antichrist NOW66: i love being me
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| the one with the second day. |
[17 Aug 2004|03:10pm] |
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today was fun. i saw spencer before anyone else and i gave him a hug in the cafeteria. i hope i don't scare him, but at least northwest is better than myers park. today was much more academic than yesterday. i mouthed to amanda across the room for all of geometry, and ms masters, excuse me, ms meyer, rambled on about getting her name changed. and nic kitzmiller sits in front of amanda, and last year it was katiey. and amanda was wearing a shirt of the same band as william's. it made me laugh. and then i had chemistry and i sit at a table with rebecca ringley, ashley pierson, and dani. what a lively table. we owe that to dani and me, though. and then we left chemistry in a pack to french, and i sit behind dani for a change, and next to brooke, sort of, and jamie. everyone kept looking at me and laughing when i hiccuped. i'm used to it. but i dislike being laughed at. and after lunch i got into a very bad mood and i didn't enjoy journalism nearly as much as i thought i would. partly because mr jackson relayed the whole libel speach i heard at the beginning of the summer to the class, and i was bored but i wrote it down again anyway. and then i found kennedy and we listened to ben folds on the way home. she was more talkative than i expected. i guess i'm just used to kate.
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| the one with cole. |
[16 Aug 2004|04:29pm] |
suze: my mother might take me to visit you guys this fall!
suze: i miss everyone like hell.
cole: dude seriously?!?!?!?!?!
cole: thats pimp
cole: ill be all, yo
cole: and ull be all, yo
cole: and thats it
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| the one with the first day. |
[16 Aug 2004|03:44pm] |
i woke up this morning thinking my alarm was being independent again, going off in the dark. so i got up to turn it off, and then i remembered i had school. it was cold in my room as i put on the adorable polka-dotted skirt i made with my black rainbows, salmon colored tank, and black cardigan. i straightened my hair, did my makeup, put in my contacts, AND ate breakfast before i left. and it really threw off my groove that we didn't go pick up kate. oh god that bothered me. all morning. it's strange. so now i have this new, complex afternoon carpool. i dislike the complexity of it. my life is already too complex, i can't handle that girl anyway. her and her voice... ugh!
i saw spencer this morning. he cheered me up after a homeroom from hell. not really though, because boskovich was there. but other 'bri-' people were there, and i was made angry. all day. and then amanda helped me laugh it off. god i missed her. i missed them all.
i have good and bad feelings about this year. more bad than good.
i'm still so nervous, and it's over.
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| the one with jessica's party. |
[15 Aug 2004|01:26pm] |
last night was plenty fun. i needed to get out of the house for a few hours and forget about my life at home. i've been in a much better mood since last night.
i saw nick. whoa buddy he's hot... ter than i last saw him. seventh grade at some dance i went to. he licked me. and felt my ass and boobs while he looked for his phone. he was molesting lily. and annie. and some other girls i didn't know. he's turned into quite the ladies' man. ah, good times. and ellie didn't come! i miss her. but kristin's mom gave me the most kick ass hello kitty thong. and kristin got me spam earrings. yay.
anyhow. i'm going to go scan pictures. i got my three from mexico and some from last thanksgiving and the bikini pictures from kelsey's party. and the other roll is pictures from galveston two summers ago and mountain top, though it is not the daniel and reid infested roll.
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| the one with the rain. |
[14 Aug 2004|09:01am] |
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my life is so depressing. i'm going back to bed so i can listen to the falling rain on my roof. i might even fall asleep. the rain and i are just alike. falling.
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